The Hardest Thing You Will Ever Do
The final post in a series about body image.
When you are ready to quiet the loud voice in your mind that tells you that your body is not good enough as it is, you are going to have to do one of the hardest things you will ever do.
You will have to let go of the story you’re believing about yourself or about how your body should look. Sounds easy enough. But it’s not.
I believe that the love for your body is already inside of you. It is buried deep down. Your work to do is to relinquish or let go of your beliefs, so you can get the real you.
I think of that love for yourself like a prized, hidden treasure. X marks the spot and that X is you. It is right there, but you have got to grab a shovel and uncover that treasure. With each scoop of dirt you remove (poor thoughts about you), you are getting closer and closer to pure love.
You are pure love.
Physically you were made from love.
Spiritually you are created from the God of Love.
Your whole being is synonymous with love.
It only makes sense that anything, except love for yourself, will be rejected and completely useless when it comes to creating your best self.
We have been so confused. We think that our mean and nasty beliefs about ourselves will encourage us to change so we can look and act differently and then we can finally love ourselves.
The only way is to slowly, LOVING, remove the dirt.
It means we push that shovel into the ground, pick up a load of dirt and examine it. We examine each belief we have to see if we want to continue believing it. We examine it to see if we want to allow ourselves to hold on to the thought.
We have to ask if we must really believe it.
We have to decide if believing it is beneficial in any way. But you must be cautious because your brain is tricky. It thinks that those negative thoughts, are keeping us safe. That they are in some way, helping us to BECOME thinner, more beautiful or more righteous. But they are not.
We have to look at those thoughts without judgment. Once you judge yourself and get frustrated that you can’t let go of your self negativity, then you are just adding to that negativity.
What does it look not to get upset with yourself for being unkind?
It looks like:
“I still believe that my stomach should look different, and that’s ok. I’m learning to believe something else.”
“I made a mistake today. My old self would say that I am worthless and will never figure it out. It’s OK. I am not believing that anymore. I am learning to love myself regardless.”
Love for yourself is the answer. ALWAYS!
I asked a new client to write a letter to herself. A letter to her current self, whom she has loathed and been unkind to for as long as she can remember, from her future self, who has achieved a goal she wants to achieve.
I read it while sitting in a volleyball game last night. Chills ran through my body and tears came to my eyes. It is filled with so much love, I had to share it with you. It is from this place, this place of love, that you will BECOME LOVE. You will become YOU.
Dear Current Self,
You are the answer.
You keep searching all over the place for the final secret for loving you as you are.
You are the place. You are the secret.
You keep seeking for more knowledge, the missing piece to put the puzzle together.
You are the knowledge. You are the missing piece.
You keep rummaging for the right tool to use.
You are an entire tool chest. A Mary Poppins like tool chest with anything and everything you could ever need.
You keep waiting for the weight to be off to start living your dreams.
You are living right now. You are your dreams.
You are not missing, or broken, or less than.
You do not need to be found, or fixed, or greater.
You are the answer.
Love, Your Future Self
If these blog posts have struck a chord with you, you are not alone. I have done many mini-sessions with women, just like you over the past month, who are ready to quiet the unkind chatter in their head, once and for all. Come to a free mini-coaching call and see what it feels like to silence the noise. It feels so good. You only have noise and chatter to lose and peace and love to gain.