Marriage and Self Confidence

Often times people get married, hoping to feel complete.  They want to find the person who “completes” them.

This is a nice thing to think about.  It seems noble and romantic.  But it also infers that you are not a complete person yet.  That perhaps you are not confident in who you are alone.

Can you imagine how much more fun marriage will be if both partners show up feeling complete and confident?  When we lack confidence we look for other people to fill that void.  That is a lot of pressure and is very confusing for the partner who is trying to figure out exactly what they need to say and do to increase someones confidence.

The truth is, it doesn’t matter what your spouse or anyone says to you, if you don’t believe what they are saying, it won’t help you to feel confident.

Just think about it.  If someone says you are beautiful or that you look hot in those jeans, if you don’t believe it, you won’t hear them.

You are the only person who can increase your self-confidence.  You are the only person who can “complete” you.

How do we increase our self-confidence?

It comes from changing your thoughts about yourself.

Listen to the words you speak to yourself.  It is a great eye opener to your self-confidence.

Do you trust yourself?

Are you kind to yourself?

Do you think you are a failure?

Our brains do not produce self-confidence naturally.  We naturally gravitate towards fear, worry and doubt about ourselves.

In order to increase in self-confidence, we have to be willing to experience feelings we don’t like.

We have to be willing to consistently experience discomfort in order to be self-conident.

We have to feel fear and be ok with it and realize it doesn’t mean there is anything wrong with us.

We have to be willing to feel embarrassment or humiliation and trust that we can still be kind to ourselves.

Self-confidence takes bravery.  It is realizing that you are divine at the core.  Everything you ever want to be is already within you, you just have to discover it.




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